Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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