i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
