it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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