I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
