I'm eating all of the evidence.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize