We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
