a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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