My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
