What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
should my penis look like a turkey
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
