No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
