In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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