They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
