I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
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