we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
