Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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