when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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