Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
