his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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