just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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