Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
third nipple confirmed
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
