I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
