Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize
