Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
