I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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