I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Randomize
