She's JV to your varsity
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
