Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
