I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
