im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
