If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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