How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
