It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
