you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Randomize
