how can u be prego again
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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