I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
