How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I need to stop coming to work sober
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
