p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
