Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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