whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
please come you make the beer taste better
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
