i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize