I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
