So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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