What a fucking waste of an outfit
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Randomize