Just took my morning after pill in the library
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
