New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
