love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
