Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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