Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
The feeling are messing with the penis
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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