doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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