Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
