Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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