My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
