I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Randomize